A couple of months ago one of our regular customers called and told me that the Pacifier Fairy lived at our store. I was to be the assistant Pacifier Fairy and my job was to pass all pacifiers along to said fairy. Not too long after the call, in they came. Her daughter very solemnly handed me a bag filled with pacifiers and I very solemnly took them and said that I would keep them safe until I could give them to the Pacifier Fairy. And then they happily went to pick out a toy in exchange for the pacifiers. Our little customer turned and gave one last look before leaving without her beloved objects of comfort, a little unsure about this whole affair, but nonetheless, bravely moving on to life beyond the paci.
Not too long after that, a couple came into the store with their little girl. The child, obviously quite pleased with herself, handed me a cutout of an umbrella with two rows of stickers. Each of these stickers represented a hard day’s work of behaving well. There were 14 stickers. So for two weeks of good behavior, the child was rewarded with a very pretty umbrella. She was all smiles. When I asked the father if he wanted the sticker chart returned, he said that they had plenty of others at home in all different shapes and sizes. But I did not throw it away and, in fact, it is still under the counter.
Now although I have resorted to rewards on occasion, I personally am not a big fan of using them on a regular basis. I have found that they tend to get out of hand and children expect bigger and better rewards for their accomplishments. Also, if everything is rewarded all the time, then, research shows, children don’t want to do anything without the reward and actually become less, rather than more, motivated. However, I am certainly aware of the realities of life and that desperate times call for desperate measures. And I have learned well not to judge how others choose to parent.
Therefore, I (and everyone else at Grow With Me) am more than happy to play along with any nonviolent scheme any parent may think up to help move things along in the right direction. I keep that paper umbrella under the counter because I feel privileged to have been trusted with such an important role, however small, in the life of a child. So feel free to give us a call ahead of time or whisper directions to us. After all, we parents have to stick together! And I kind of like being the official Assistant to the Pacifier Fairy:-)
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